aside from managing my money, i think the biggest struggle in my life right now, is understanding that my life has a purpose, and that i need to be content with celibacy. im not saying im not happy, or that im feeling down. i find joy in my life. but i know the feeling of liking someone, the i-know-where-you-are-in-the-room-liking someone, where you dress prettier when you know that persons gonna be there. that kind of liking, that makes you have a pep in your step. that brings a type of happiness. and lately. i just dont have that.
i guess what im trying to say is, im trying to figure out if im okay with that or not. its a nice refreshing change from how i usually am. and i suppose it is making me focus on other important things in my life. and im not saying its boring, because i still have fun. but, its just a weird feeling. i feel like im missing something. and i guess its better than the alternative, and constantly be thinking about it. i am blessed in that way. and I know God will surprise me. i guess until then, i will be me. and just focus on life goals and ambitions.
ohh gosh.
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