where has the christmas spirit gone?

On one of my many trips on a bus this week I overheard a young girl, maybe around 20 years of age describing to an aquaintance that she had been to a Puma outlet sale, where everything was 50% off. She went on to tell the other girl how she bought 3 pairs of shoes, and 3 track suits, as well as pants and a top from the Adidas outlet store. In total she said she spent $400.00. Okay... thats fine. But then she goes on to tell this other girl that she couldnt afford to spend money on presents for any family or friends because she "only makes 8 dollars an hour" with that the girl she was talking to replied, "life is too short, you need to treat yourself first." I felt my mouth drop. I do believe we need to treat ourselves sometimes. keyword: sometimes. But at this time of year, on this holiday? Isnt the point of christmas, that we drive into children, to give to others? As well as the story behind christmas, the fact that it isnt even ab0ut presents at all. It is about the day Jesus was born. I truly wish that the girl was just an exception, and that the whole world isnt as cold and greedy as she is. But as a request, I ask that those of you who read this pray for those who do not realize what christmas is about, and also for those less fortunate. Everyone deserves a Merry Christmas.

God Bless.
&Merry Christmas♥

From my Family to yours,
Lots of Love
Kylie

hmmm..

So, i realized that once i am "altered" I wont be the same person anymore. but does that mean what im known for will change? Will what people love about me change? was it that, that made me? I dont think it will, but you never know, the asking might stop, and that would suck alot. alot alot. :(

plural visions.

so, what does it mean when you look in the distance and see the wall, sky, etc shake? almost a quiver-like movement. because i can tell you right now. its happening to me. and im freaking out. heart attack????
ahhh

along for the ride.

Josh is coming home soon. 4 days to be exact. so no big deal but i miss him lots. my hair is getting longer and i like like like it. i missed last episode of glee and i feel like im dying. heart to heart's are good. kyle, i want your orange funnel cake! i do i do. courtney had a birthday today. 19 woot. i love you sweetums. i think i might be coming down with something though. my throat is really sore, and my body aches. yuck. my mom wants me to join farmville. ohhh myyy mother. no WAY. farmville = darkside. i will not join. relient k relient k relient k you are amazing. thank you for coming out and not dissapointing many many fans. b.reith & stephanie smith were awesome too. And toby mac?? welll.. umm.. yea.. not much to say there. :P britnee's grandma was awesome. and bob and ernie should have really come home with me. i miss you yoony. and when i say that i mean it. hope your play goes/went well :) sorority life is my life and i would really appreciate it if more ladies joined my house. big deal. cory is silly sometimes. he does his smiley faces with noses.. aka. :-) like.. who does that? OHH YEA. Cory does. haha. there you happy? i have learned how to make london fogs at home. PRAISE THE LORD! so so yummy. i think i need a new house coat. and ohhh myyy. i am not wearing my slippers right now. ohhhh goodness gracious. well thats alright. they will be on in a short amount of time. maybe i will go watch a movie with my mom? what do you think? no? yes? maybe? i dont really care all that much sorry. im going to go and sing a lullaby to my pet cat. he is fat. a fat cat who is orange. and by the way orange cats are mean. and they hurt people and its not cool. okay.

adios amigos.
aRRRRiibaaa!!

ky.

`and we'll be a dancing generation••••

lets talk about this for a second. okay? lets talk about why you hate me. lets talk about how you dont even know me. lets talk about how no matter how hard i try to change it my favorite color will be always be purple. lets talk about how im a kid in a grownups body. YOU DONT KNOW ME! "just let it melt"

i have ideas for this blog. whenever i hear a sermon i write notes in this notebook that i have. I have decided that I will post the notes onto here. just another coppy of it. this way i can let the word of god be spread farther than just my church! YO can I get a Witness?[ HUUUHHHH]

also also also. just a little side note about yours truly. umm.. no big deal or anything. 5th concert this year TONIGHT!!

RELIENT K & TOBY MAC & DAVID CROWDER! all the good people.

I AM SO HAPPY AND EXCITED ♥

ttfn.

vancouvers lights.

I watched as her breath came out of her mouth, slowly forming in the cold air coming out in cloudy swirls. there was more blood now. I held her arm, putting pressure on the wound. WHERE WAS THE AMBULANCE? If they didnt get here quick I was going to lose my friend. "Dont worry, it will be okay, just stay still, keep breathing, I know it hurts, just a few more minutes I promise" I said trying to keep my voice calm. She was closing her eyes now, her breathing slowing. I had never known anyone who had died before, which is odd considering im 18, but my great grandparents, and grandparents had all died before I was born. I never had to deal with the grief. What if she died tonight? What if I never got to see her again, talk about Paul with her again, tell her secrets about my mom, laugh about the stupid girls at school. I felt my face, it was hot and sticky, I was crying, I wiped my eyes. "Lizzie, please dont die. I cant get through high school alone. I need you. Your my best friend. please dont die" Just then I heard the sirens coming from down the street. As they came closer I kissed Lizzie on the cheek. I watched her, her breath as cloudy swirls. The ambulance was right beside me now. The paramedics getting their gear. Lizzie was really pale now, lips turning blue, I watched her breath, praying it wouldnt stop. Then I saw no more cloudy swirls, no more movement in her chest, no more breathing. A paramedic kneeled beside me and checked Lizzie's pulse "Time of death: 10:37, I'm really sorry about your loss, if you would please stand back while we get her onto the gurney". I stood up and looked around, the street so abandoned, I felt so lost, and confused of what had happened in the past hour. This shouldnt have happened, I shouldnt have gotten involved. I pulled out my cellphone dialed a number and waited for someone to pick up.
"Hello" she said
"Mom" I started to weep, my nose all runny, and my vision blurred "umm, mom, Lizzie, she umm, shes gone mom, shes gone".
"Sweety, whats the matter? What happened? Where did lizzie go? Do you need me to pick you up?" My mom sounded panicked.
"Mom, Lizzie.. she died tonight, a few minutes ago actually" I was onto crying now, streams of tears coming down my face.
Nothing. Not a sound came from the other side of this conversation. I could picture my moms face, blank stare, and mouth open. then a sound.. some sniffling. through sniffles she whispered.
"ill be right there".

i dont know you.

you could be dead for all i know. you could of been in a car accident. or raped and murdered. you could be rich. you could have short hair, you could have long hair. do i look like you? do we have the same eyes? same smile? I am blessed believe me. but you wouldnt know that. i bet your a fun person. I bet you have kids of your own, maybe even grandchildren. You probably spoil them. because they are yours. they came in the right timing of life. It hasnt really bothered me until recently. because really, i didnt think it affected me. but just like my blood is mine, you are mine too. I dont know you. i probably never will. Im not saying your decision was wrong. Im sure, you couldnt handle things when you were younger. thats fair. but what about now? are you just afraid of the conflict? the lies? you dont want people to know? see because.. i have a missing piece to my puzzle. which will affect me my whole life. you will never read this. you wont know who i am if i pass you on the streets. I only know your first name. im cherishing that piece of information. I guess i wish you the best of luck with your life. I pray that you are blessed like me. your special to me, and i dont even know you!?! your a pretty lucky woman.

good luck g.
kylie.

your nothing but a sad face.

oh hey. so. why are you ditching me?
why are you making this hard for us?
I understand you have priorities but you seem to be purposely avoiding me.
did i do something wrong?
or something right?
I love you alot, so it hurts that this is happening.
you werent in my dreams, when everyone else was.
maybe this is a sign.
maybe this is fate.

oh glorious God.

how do you manage to do the things that you do. you are so graceful and wonderful. you have such a pure-ness and know me so well. im so compassionate lord, you have silenced my cries. i feel like my life is so bright right now. new possibilities right now. nothing can stop me, and i have you to thank. thank you Jesus for dying for me, thank you for letting me live, thank you for giving me hope when i am weak. thank you for subtle signs. thank you for my life. I am forever faithful to you, and i cherish my life with you in it. Im so grown, I make decisions based on you, and what is right. thank you oh sovereign lord.

♥

you wont relent until you have it all.

my lip is bleeding. only close friends know that i have a habit and that the outcome is a bleeding lip. this day is fresh, i can smell the freshness right now. the rain pitter patters but this day is new and shiny. filled with endly possibilities. like one of those plan your own adventure books. no body knows how this day will end. And yet, what if it wasnt fresh? considering I was living yesterday.. what if you looked at it like, today is just a continuum from yesterday, and really this day is not a new one but rather the same one, just continued. what makes us know that we have new days everday. im finding it hard to breath more and more now. it makes me think of my previous prediction earlier this year. it makes me scared. i just wish i had a set map of how things will happen, and with things working out like they are, im doubting it will happen now. God wouldnt put these things in my life if it was going to happen.

dont worry, dont worry.
im still here.

theres a cry in my heart for your glory to come.

i feel as if i have the weight of the world on my shoulders.
and im not going to drop off all my emotions on this website like a shrink.
but i feel as if i might explode with anger, and frustration and confusion.
i need for time to stand still for me to gather my thoughts.
i miss her so much. and she doesnt care.
i want to be a better person. like a real better person.
why cant i get things right the first time?
why cant i stop thinking about those things?
im always putting myself in these positions, being vulnerable, and easily hurt.
i like being alone, no one hurts me, and i cant hurt anyone.
but no one wants to leave me alone.
they want me, and they will never let go.

you could be happy

You could be happy and I won't know
But you weren't happy the day I watched you go
And all the things that I wished I had not said
Are played in loops 'till it's madness in my head
Is it too late to remind you how we were
But not our last days of silence, screaming, blur
Most of what I remember makes me sure
I should have stopped you from walking out the door
You could be happy, I hope you are
You made me happier than I'd been by far
Somehow everything I own smells of you
And for the tiniest moment it's all not true
Do the things that you always wanted to
Without me there to hold you back, don't think, just do
More than anything I want to see you, girl
Take a glorious bite out of the whole world.


Im frustrated, because I once again let peer pressure influence my decisions in life. Im not okay with this. I feel ganged up on. I feel like a marinet. I feel like people are deciding how I want to live. I just want to live my own life, make mistakes, have fun. Be myself.

please.

the millionaire.

I want to be a multimillionaire. And not for the reasons you think. Sure it would be nice to have money, but I just want to give people money. I want to give people head starts to a better life. Because some people have it hard right now. It breaks my heart to see lack of money become an issue of homelessness and lack of food. For someone who is so genuine and warm and kind. For someone who puts 100% into life. For someone who has to support his new family now. I want to give him money. To put food on the table for him. To feed his baby. Lord please shine down on his family right now. They are in a financial crisis here lord, and i ask that you give him strength and patience God. Lord show him you will provide God. Please love him and prove your glory. He needs help lord and ask this of you. amen.

this is for real.

"We can't hide, we let go

We've got more than we know

My friends are a different breed

My friends are everything

Make this last, take it slow

We've got it all figured out for now

So let us live our lives without a doubt"

For those of you, whom are my friend. Who have been with me, through thick and thin. Who have seen me cry. Who know my strengths and weaknesses. I love you, And, I cant imagine my world with different friends, because Im pretty sure they wouldnt even compare to how great you are. Thank You for everything.

♥♥♥♥♥

put your hands up.

So.. Its been a while. And, well.. I have much to say. Like for instance I am totally psyched for this week coming up. So much Friend time its insane. I love working where I work. There are some days where its like.. GR. I hate work.. (ulcers anyone?) lol. But for the most part I get along with everyone, and everyone is really nice. Im going to a Regina Spektor concert next Monday. I am soo excited, and cant wait to hear some good tunes. Then on the Wednesday, a documentary by Hillsong United. Capturing the true sadness of todays society. Then IMPACT, and finally the island at Qwanoes camp. Im looking forward to it. ALSO. Halloween anyone? I love dressing up. Love it to pieces. This Halloween im being a Rocker Chick. OHH yea. So it shall be fun. Im counting down the minutes. (okay.. well im really not) I miss my friends. Like.. my actual friends. The friends I spend like all the time with. Can you call it love? haha.

rock on.
ky.

I got it going on.

So im NOT going to come out and say it. But its going to happen. Im approved and im psyched. This means I will in a sense have a whole new life. Feel better about myself. I couldnt be more happier. in fact. Im pumped to the limit. Its a big deal and you all should be excited. :)

people think shes dating someone named kyle.

So i know this girl.. ohhh wait.. whats her name again.. Argumed?.. nope.. thats not it.. ohhh yea.. BRITNEEE. because thats how she rolls. she writes her name with 3 e's mhmm. she likes to die her hair, different colors every few months. and i love her for it. she is special to me. because i see her as a sister. not a friend. we have a connection that i felt the first day of meeting her. she is soo soo funny and in many ways dances to the beat of her own drum? did i say that right? I DONT CARE. she will understand. because I love her and she loves me. She is a constant in my life and i love how she cares about me, like she actually worries about me. haha. i love her so much and wouldnt change anyhting about her. ohh and by the way she showers and brushes her teeth at the same time. like.. how jealous are you right now that she can do stuff like that? oh yea/ she is a keeper. and i dont care what happens. I will always be her friend and love her because we ALWAYs work things out. and i can count on her for being there to support me. We will go to New Zealand because we were meant for it. ohh yes. we are.

i love you argumed.
kiss&hug.

[take a picture it last longer-okay-CLICK CLICK]

ky.

No one's laughing at God in a hospital.

I wish I could tell everyone how this girl is so amazing. how much i wish i could be like her. how her optimism, and her presence lights a room. She is strong, and brave. I cant put in words how angry I am, that this could happen. It hurts my heart. And I just pray for strength, because I know I am not feeling nowhere near the amount of pain her family is feeling. But I am dying inside. She gives me hope, for my life. She makes me feel like I can do anything. She makes me laugh. You wanna put a smile on for her, you want to tell her that it will go away. But that smile cant be genuine. Lord GOD. I knew it would come. God, I knew this time would come, and i still havent prepared for it. I will not give up on her lord. Its weird how I rely on the people in my life who struggle the most. I need them to show me that I can win my battles as well. But God i need her. Because what is this world, my family without her. God we will be hollow. Let her be an angel, God, let her be one for this family. Let her shine her light on us. Her struggles, God, I want them to show anyone who is afraid to just suck it up. There are bigger problems.

I love her.

my dear friend.

its going to be hard. I know it will be awkward. and to be honest im scared. im scared your not going to want us anymore. to want me. im scared you will feel left out. it wont be the same. i know that. i expect that. but i dont want it to be like what we were never happened. what we had was just a period in ourlives. because i want to be your friend. i want to be a part of your life. i need to be a part of your life. and like right now im freaking out because i know that it will not be the same. i can remember driving. starbucks. snow. fun. love. i miss you. i miss your laugh. i miss how you laugh at me. i miss your voice. i miss your hugs. i miss our memories. i miss your presence. we are always missing someone in our group. your spot is always reserved for you. i miss your smell. i miss your tuna sandwiches. i miss our talks. i feel replaced. do you know what it feels like to feel replaced. to feel not needed. to feel like they have someone better now. new friends. new people to hang out with. like. i dont know where this is coming from. but i think these feelings have been supressed for a while now. that whole time i was acting like it was ok. like everything was fine. i was trying to avoid the gap between us. but you know what i miss you. i dont know if this is weird. or awkward or seeming like im really depressed. but i miss my friend. and i feel really confused and scared about what will happen next, how things will play out. and how things will be. until then i guess i shall wait. and pray for you.

hugs&kisses.

to change the world. one person at a time.

My one motivation in life now is to bring you closer to God.

To show you his ways. His love and grace.

To show you that you are not alone, and that he can and will save.

early morning rituals get you nowhere.

Lets dance to the same music everytime. I want to dance to the same music everytime. What music you ask? Music that can change the way you feel.

For years I have been left out of everything. I never made any close friends, so i became used to the feeling of being alone. I became cautious and careful, and protected and guarded myself. I was my own friend. Someone I could count on. One day I remember walking home alone, and coming to a cross roads. Making sure there were no cars coming, I walked across, as I was walking I saw a necklace on the ground. I quickly picked it up, and continued walking. It was a friendship necklace. Something I had never had the oppurtunity of having. It was a gold heart with the word friend engraved onto it. For just a moment I thought of what it would be like to have someone who was my friend, someone who would tell me secrets, and play with me, and care about me, someone who was loyal and honest and someone who could laugh with me. I instantly thought of my mother telling me about God, and how he was a friend to her. I thought of how I wanted to be his friend too.Just then a car driving by swirved and hit me. I died that day. My body turned cold and stiff, and I wasnt human anymore. I became a spirit and floated up to Heaven. Once there I saw God. He told me that everything was going to be okay and that I had a friend now. I started to cry because for the first time I felt the power of friendship. That feeling of support and love. God has a friend in me.

May God have a friend in you. Because he is the most important friend.

those clouds are fluffy.

110 sleeps, 14 hours, 41 minutes until christmas.
:)

Im going back to Family.

Thank You Family. You are who I am. We are each other.
we
love
each
other.
Because If I didnt have you, who would I be?

A dream, is a wish your heart makes.

So. Lately I have been having some odd dreams. Im not implying that I am the only one who has odd dreams. I mean Come on. Everyone does. But for me, these dreams consist of things I cant really tell anyone. These dreams consist of something, I think I subconciously want. But I am so confused. You see, I am all about doing things in God's time, and letting him have his way with my life. The old ' what would jesus do' idea. The thing is... these dreams.. I dont know if its what God wants, like.. Am I supossed to want this? Is it me wanting this or God? If God wants it, then I want it too, but.. If its just me who wants it.. then.. i dont know. I know what your going to say... Pray about it. And I will.. But at the same time.. I dont even know if I want it. Like, It would be risking alot, and what if it doesnt work out. Alot to pray and think about.

overcome with emotion.

It's like Im jealous,

mad,

sad,

angry,

hurt,

content,

happy,

excited,

concerned,

offended,

all at the same time.

its overwhelming,

and all those emotions are felt for different reasons.

So..

now what?

i love the work of God.

"I tried calling God last night
But i didnt have him in my contacts
So I dialed jesus christ
It was too long
So i dialed help please
It was long distance, and i was scared of who would answer
So i hung up before i got connected
I wonder who would have answered, i wonder what they would have said
I typed in God in search for my contacts anyways
Helga Wamsley came up,
She's a girl that i went to art class with for like 2 months,
Helga isnt eve her real name
I felt like calling her, but knew that i shouldn'tI don't know her well enough, and havent talked to her in like 7 months
But i wish i did, i felt like it was a sign
I went shopping with my sister today,
and we went to a store that had clothes in it that that girl would wear
Another sign?
I'm not going to talk to her though
What's she going to do?
Shes my brothers age
Stupid cellular"

please. for me. txt her.

a days rain drop can feed the world.

she smiled in a big way, the way a girl like that smiles when the world is hers and she held your eyes out in the breezeway down by the shore in the lazy summer and she pulled you in, and she bit your lip, and she made you hers she looked deep into you as you lay together quiet in the grasp of dusk and summer but you've already lost when you only had barely enough to hang on and she combed your hair, and she kissed your cheek and she made you better than you'd been before she told you bad things you wished you could change in the lazy summer and she told you, laughing down to her core, so she would not cry as she lay in your lap she said "nobody here can live forever, quiet in the grasp of dusk and summer" but you've already lost when you only had barely enough to hang on she said, "no one is alone the way you are alone"and you held her looser than you would have if you ever could have known some things tie your life together, slender threads and things to treasure days like that should last and last and last but you've already lost when you only had barely enough of her to hang on, hang on, hang on, hang on

I'M SORRY

beggars can't be choosers my dear.

nights where its cold enough to wear sweaters,
and huddle in front of fires,
to keep warmth and feel calm,
where sounds are loud compared to the silence you hear
drifting in and out,
zippers, rocks, whispers.
where you truely feel free of
the worlds clutches on you,
where life is simple, and simple things happen,
where you can have peace and clarity in your day.
i want that, i want to go back there.

sins cast shadows over our souls.

you have moved on,
you have become a different person,
but the scars are still there,
they tell people who you were,
some may turn their heads,
some may judge you for what you did,
but in my eyes,
because you are alive today,
because you were strong enough
to get help, and take a stand.
you are stronger then many i know.
thank you for being there friday night,
for being brave enough to wear a t-shirt.
for showing the world that life is hard,
but we must be strong.
thank you.

avada kedavra

Harry Potter 6 was amazing.

Matthew- we need to go to Hogwarts.

reading the 7th again.

when those mouse ears come around.

4 times.
I will have been to Disneyland 4 times this summer. Today, as I was waiting for the dealership to be opened, I smelt pancakes and syrup and sausage and beautiful breakfast smells. For some reason it reminded me of Disneyland. For those of you, who havent been to Disneyland LET ME TELL YOU.

When you are walking down the street towards the entrance of Disneyland, there is Disney music playing. Most people who go, do not tell people about this. Like automatically you are in this amazing mood, and you feel like a kid again. Then you wait in line, either for Disneyland or California adventure theme park. They stamp your hand everyday with a disney character. that allows you to leave the park, (if you have a hopper pass) Everything is spotless, and clean. There is no garbage on the ground and everyone is so nice.

the rides are amazing. pirates, indiana, space mountain, autopia, i cant even find words. Courtney and I are going in August, We have gone together before, last year with her parents, but this year we are going together alone. im scared, but so much more excited. OMG. its going to be amazing.

DISNEYLAND HERE I COME.

why are you confusing me.

first he says that he is in a relationship, and wants to get out of it. then he is talking about getting flowers for "her". Then he is talking about taking his WIFE to harry potter. for real. this guy is so creepy. like. what is his deal???

"lets see what can do"

brett got his braces off. i wonder how he feels now. any different? i got a new camera, and i still feel horrible for letting him buy it. kyle is back home on canadian ground. he has soo much to tell me. im excited. im so happy for cass. i love her so much && miss her terribly. I worry about britnee. i dont know why, i just do. im sleepy this morning, but i bought some vegetables. destery is amazing, and i wish he was my friend. "this episode is about, i dont even know" i might go to mexico with Courtney next year. woot. sun. like 7 weeks until im in LA. like 6 weeks until im in PA. mmmh. thats yummy. chris said his baby toe weighs 1000lbs and is 10ft tall. wow. i want to fit in that dress. there was a post secret today that made me sad and sickened. the "grocery store list" one. i thought about josh this morning, and i thought about how much i wish i could talk to him, i need my best friend back. i have 4 days to fit into that dress. i am bff with my bus driver its not even funny. today she told me she wont be able to drive me next week, but she will be back the following week. i mean COMEON your jealous. i had a dream about being in a house. in that house there was a party going on with the most random people in my life. like one of the sales guys and Vanessa hudgens? omg like really. did that just happen? Rob & Kristen are no longer going out, oh darn. Jon & Kate dont talk to each other anymore, so sad. thats what babies will do to you. lets go to the beach. i mean it. lets go. scabs are actually so cool. it was sunny this morning now its cloudy :( why. oh why clouds did you have to come.
ok.
ill leave you with a little something.
"lets see what can do"
[brett you should know where this is from]

ciao

i miss my Tessa-ling.

♥

maybe God is sneakier than I thought.

We all know the quote "God works in mysterious ways" But until we see his mysterious ways in action, it is just a quote. Over the past few weeks, every Sunday, I wait with this girl for the bus. We dont talk to each other, or communicate in any way. But today, when I walked up to the bus stop she asked me if I was going to work, which I replied with a yes, and told her where I work. I then asked her where she was going and she as well was going to work. She works at a hair salon, and she cuts hair. We didnt talk much, but for the first time, in what seems like an eternity I felt a sense of relief and calmness and peace.

You see, I have always, always loved doing hair. When I was a kid, I was even determined that I was going to be a hairdresser, but was told that I wouldnt make that much money, and it wouldnt be a good goal for myself.

Well you know what? Right now I am looking at different Hair dressing schools, I realized that yea in the long run its good to have a goal to make money and be successful, but I need to be happy with what Im learning and doing with my life, and if cutting hair makes me happy. guess what! IM GOING TO DO IT.

I think I might develop a friendship with this girl [i dont know her name yet] but already have so much to thank her for.

and who knows, down the road, if im not liking the hair cutting so much, I can go and change my career.

I was so scared that I didnt have a map for my life, and that it wasnt planned out. I knew I was young, but I wanted to have my life all set by my mid-twenties. Im done with that theory.
I am young, and I have my whole life to do whatever I want.

OHHH YEAAAAA. WHATEVER I WANTTTT.

can you tell im happy? lol.

kylie ♥ xoxo.

he was a gonner.

i am never going to learn how to be good at giving directions, even to the bathroom. i regret everything. i feel dirty. i feel used. i feel out of sorts. it happened again. years of determination. years of stepping in the right direction. one day. one time. one reaction. i blew it. i dont care who else i let down. i dont. because the feeling that i have within me that rots my soul, and eats my insides will not go away anytime soon. as much as i try to run, try to pretend everything is okay, try to forget what happened, the memory will still be there and haunt me. they are scared. they act like strangers around me. I wish they would believe me. I wish they would understand that this will NEVER happen again. that this is the final straw and im disgusted. that im turning my back on whoever that was who did that. that i care about myself. that i have changed and that i have no idea why it happened. but they dont believe me. they think this is a real problem. that i cannot be trusted. that this is serious. that i have issues.

im done with that life.
why cant you believe me?

get me some sunshine & some lemonade.

Ray Keeps eating Chris and Rocco's Werthers. I tell him to stop, but does he? NO. I feel jealous. I feel upset. But do i? I dont know anymore. I am getting more shifts. This makes me feel like im accomplishing things. This guy always eyes me up and down, and gives me that i-want-to-do-you smile. [ I am repelled ] I think its time to go back and face the gym. It has missed me, and my body has missed it. I took the twins to the park today. It was a blast. Oh for sure. Sorry Ayren, I think your a gonner. Susan almost cried today when she told me how much i mean to her. :) I need to go tanning again. BADLY. I watched vantage point last night. pretty good. If you have ears read this statement. I have no ears... Oh well thats ashame. shall we buy you some? maybe.. but i dont know if i can afford them. hmm.. better open a savings account. My friend is in New Zealand. and guess what???? I miss him like crazy, with every ounce of me. I need to see him and feel him and hear him. I have mysterious bug bites on my legs, and I blame courtney for them, I got them from her bed. bah. Jon & Kate died in my books. They dont deserve my respect anymore. Billy Mays died. Who will promote Oxyclean now? maybe I will? okay. I will.
BUY OXYCLEAN NOW OR ELSE YOU WILL DIE A MOST HORRIFYING DEATH. ok? Buy it. I guess i should also mention the king of pop. yes yes. Michael Jackson died. Im sorry MJ. I loved your music kid. Britnee's birthday is tomorrow. HAPPY BIRTHDAY BRITNEE. I love you. and i needed that phone call. Wherever tess speller is. I know she somehow follows my blog still. I miss you and I love you and I wear that bracelet you gave me everyday++ I use the purse. :) I think we all need some good times. OK. I am going to Greenday this saturday.. guess with who? oh.. yea.. greenday. Im going backstage.. and on stage to perform with them. OF COURSE NOt. why would you believe me? NO NO. im going with my mom and my sister, and Corrine, and Taylor, and Nathan, and Anna, and Jeremy. HAPPY BIRTHDAY JEREMY! oh it never gets old. I read a book called before I die, and well,, the girl in it dies.. BUT she learns that life shouldnt be taken so serious. OK?? ok. I wont take it seriously. and when i fall and scrape my knee, i will just laugh. because you cant take it seriously. ohhhhhhh KYLE NEWMAN. I miss kyle Newman. He left me for Mexico and I feel as if i cannot breathe. my cellphone is broked. like seriously. BROKEN. July 16 is my one year anniversary with Donavin Robinson. Could that be my future last name?? maybe soo... lets drink water and eat timbits. they are the wholes from doughnuts. that makes me happyy. Am i done yet? I dont know am i? I guess I should mention Ryan, Ryan is funny because he is always hungover. oh silly ryan. come to vancouver soon so we can be friends for real PLEASeE.
well well. I am most definately tired, pooped, exhausted, dead.
I will post soon.. or maybe not.
Last shoutout for the day is to my #1 cuz. he is asian,, please dont be rascist towards him.
I love him and i think he is funny.
I love you bretty.
ok ok.
ciao bellas.
kkylieeeee

a song. past. present. future.

Gone, she's gone How do you feel about it That's what I thought You're real torn up about it And I wish you the best But I could do without it And I will, because you've worn me down Oh, I will, because you've worn me down Worn me down like a road I did everything you told Worn me down to my knees I did everything to pleaseBut you can't stop thinking about her No, you can't stop thinking about her And you're wrong, you're wrong I'm not overreacting Something is off Why don't we ever believe ourselves And I, oh, I feel that word for you And I will, because you've worn me down Oh, I will because you have worn me down Worn me down like a road I did everything you told Worn me down to my knees I did everything to please But you can't stop thinking about her No, you can't stop thinking about her She's so pretty; she's so damn right But I'm so tired of thinking About her tonight Worn me down like a road I did everything you told Worn me down to my kneesI did everything to pleaseBut you can't stop thinking about herNo, you can't stop thinking about herWorn me down like a roadI did everything you told Worn me down to my knees I did everything to please Worn me down like a road I did everything you told to me to do But you, you can't stop thinking about her No, you can't stop thinking about her No, you can't stop thinking about her No, you can't stop thinking about her

my little T.

I really love her so much.

she is so strong.

and so full of life.

everyone could learn some lessons from this girl.

I love you T.

ya'll dont know me.

i know im not alone,

but

sometimes,

i feel it.

the day of dads.

Today is fathers day. Anyone who knows me really well knows that I cannot call my dad really anything besides 'daddy' or 'pappy'. I am almost nineteen years old, and still for the life of me cannot call my dad, 'dad', to his face that is, of course if i am speaking of him i will call him dad, and refer to him as my dad in pictures, and in text, but to his face, when I am talking to him, I need to call him daddy.

I have realized this is somewhat embarassing, when you think of me, out in public, at a store, at a zoo, at a dinner shin-dig, and I go to address him "daddy"... yea well, you can just imagine, the thoughts people are thinking, [did you really just call your dad that?] [is she a little girl?] believe me, i know this, and yet its like something inside me is preventing that word to come out when i go to address him. Its like when you cant get food down and you gag, your body doesnt want it. my body doesnt want me to say dad.

so now that you are filled in. Its fathers day. I am at work and I feel just terrible that I cant do something cool with my dad today. although we will do presents and dinner when I get home, its just not the same without my dad.

I have my dad to thank for alot of things. For one he is very quiet, and passive in a way. He isnt your typical overly protective father. He didnt threaten to kill my boyfriend, and I dont really have a specific curfew. We arent as close as some fathers and daughters are, but we have similarities, that i cherish. For example, I have his laugh, his eyes, and i think his nose... I am sensitive like him, im goofy like him, and i like to think we have the same sense of humour.

With this whole school issue, It is my dad who is always pushing me, who wants me to succeed, his dissapointment is only so strong because he wants me to be happy and to do well.
and now, on top of failing myself, im failing my parents, my dad especially as well. My parents raised me better then this. And I will show them. I will show my dad.

I love my dad, he is amazing.
I love you daddy.

kylie.

barf bag needed.

im finally doing it.
I AM DOING IT.
congratulations to me.
i am happy.

a friendship resolved?

oh we were going to bus home

oh, no I will give you guys a ride home.

[ride home]

thanks aaron for the ride

yeah, yeah, nice seeing you again.

[he played typical-tickle me pink]

so stoked.

Your a wizard Harry- Im a what??

-This blog is dedicated to those who need it-

I once heard that if you believe that you will be happy, it will happen. That if you thought positively, everything would work accordingly. I really dont believe that. You are dealt the cards you are dealt. Its like a real life mafia game, with a poker twist. You see, you can trade cards, and get new ones. BUT, you need to earn those new cards.

Im going to be honest. I was put on academic probation last semester at my college. That means that I have one last final chance to get my grades up next semester or im out. Believe me. I was scared. I cried. I had this gut feeling, this sick, disgusting what am I doing with my life? kind of feeling. Because, for real.. what am I doing with my life? This is why I have been blogging about finding myself. About reaching and searching for my soul. what makes me happy. Because I dont know. Everyone has a passion, whether it be music, or sports, or art, or collecting orange tic tacs, me? I have nothing. I dont know what I want in this life. I dont know what will make me happy, and what I can make money off of. So today, I opened a letter from Douglas College. A letter stating that I need to arrange a meeting with a councellor at my school before I can register. Will I be able to go back and do school work that will only make me feel unworthy?

I had wanted to become a teacher, I have years and years of experience for the practicum, but just recently I started thinking about whether I can stand being surrounded by kids constantly.

My new idea???

To become a psychologist. I would be a doctor!

what do you think??

would I make a good one?

so lost.

kylie

lets be a bright star in the dark sky.

no joke. I want to push it to the limit. I want to live my life to the fullest this summer. why you ask? ... because I have this weird feeling that after this summer, i wont be able to. I dont really know how to explain it. and im sure your like.. umm.. you can be crazy whenever you want? but.. like.. this summer is it for me. this is my big shot. to do things that i have never done before. this is my chance. to grow, this is it.

wish me luck!!

its what we do for fun ♥

.saw this picture & only thought of one person.

i love you hun

♥

then fix it Dear Henry Dear Henry

This weekend was amazing. I went to two of my best friend's birthday parties. Donavin came along with me and it was the first time he got to see me with my friends all together. He ended up making friends with my friend Cass's boyfriend Donald. and we soon realized that they had very much in common. We have been going out for almost 11 months, and I had always wanted another couple we could hang out with so it wouldnt be third wheel-ish, when we hung out with one of our friends.. all in all this weekend really strengthened us and we grew alot. I love him more then i ever have.

falling hard in love.
:)
kylie

There's a hole in my bucket, Dear Liza, Dear Liza.

you are young. you are beautiful. and I can see a plan in play. I can see your life, and what is to come. but you are blind. you are waiting. you want to wait. thats okay, but sometimes you just need to stop. you need to just stop and look around. look at what is happening, and it all makes sense. you will get through this. I know it. you are so strong, and you will get through this. i know it must be hard. i find it hard to. but remember to look around. please just look around.

♥

oh to be young again.

Over the weekend I had my grade 7 girls sleepover. While they were there one of the girls called their "boyfriend" and was chatting with him. I wanted to ask him a few questions.. so i took the phone and proceeded to ask what his intentions were, and all the protective questions.

It was funny, and a wake up call to me that my girls are growing up. They are living their lives.
I am so honored and blessed to be part of their lives. I love them ALL.

♥

She is lost inside the place she knows best.

My heart is so swollen. There have been so many emotions that my heart has gone through the past few days, it feels tender and heavy. This world has forgotten.

Last night I went to Youth Church in White Rock. Our very own Simon Gau spoke, He told this true story about a man in Europe, whose job was to lift a bridge for boats, and lower the bridge for trains. One day he brought his son to work, while the man was working.. the son fell and got stuck on the bridge. There was a train coming towards the bridge pretty fast, and the man had to decide whether to lower the bridge for the train and kill his son, or rescue his son and let 400 people on the train die.

The man didnt know what to do and was very upset, but when the time came he lowered the bridge, killing his son. He screamed and cried as the train passed. He was hurt, his son had just died so he could save all those people's lives. The sad thing was.. the people on the train had no idea.

Sound familiar? similar to what God had done. He sent his only son down to die for our sins. He was hurt, and he was sad, but it was for us. And look what this society has done. They have forgotten.

We have forgotten.

hate me today, hate me tomorrow.

I wish you would put yourself in my shoes.

Tell me I am the bad person, when all I have ever been is innocent.

I dont want to be alone.

You saw my pain, and you prayed.

Thank you.

I dont even know you.

Thank you.

We are going to get through this.

We will be strong.

Let us be strong.

Sing a song for every tear,

Live a life for every smile.

Bad experiences happen before good ones.

Believe in me, and I will believe in us.

I am not the bad person.

I wish I could tell you all the things that are wrong.

She is doing this because she loves him. She knows what he is doing is wrong, but she loves him. God's Love is unfailing, and it is our job as christians to act as him, and be forgiving and compassionate. I know he has done numerous things to ruin his life, and the lives around him. I know it seems unfair, and wrong. I know you want them to stop and think about how this is affecting his circumstances. But I doubt that they want their last memories of him to be living who knows where. God has a plan for everyone, and I believe that when it is time for him to smarten up, and get his act together he will. I have found that for something good to happen, something bad needs to happen first. It's just how the world works. I am so sorry that you haven't had him in your life, that when asked you deny. I love you. And as hard as it has been, I love him. As easy as it is to say that we should all leave him and let him smarten up that way, it might work for him to see all this love, and to understand that the world that he lived in is not loving, its hard, its raw, its not full, its empty, and one day he will realize that. Until then, prayer works, God works. God has pretty clever ways of dealing with things, and I think that in times like these we must turn to him and seek his guidance. Because we are small compared to him, He is the King of the Universe. He is almighty, and he can make a difference.
pray.pray.pray.

GodBless.
kylie.

just in case you were'nt listening.

AHHH!

June 4- Dane Cook-GM Place

July 4- Green Day- GM Place

August something-Edmonton w/ Courtney ♥

I am so stoked for these dates. I wish they would come faster so I could have some sweet stories to tell. Well thats a lie.. I have so many sweet stories to tell. Starting NOW.

1. Last friday, Kyle, Cass, Britnee and I were going to a local church to make sandwiches for the homeless. But before we went out for dinner at a place called the frog stone grill. Afterwards Britnee and I were craving a mcflurry at mcdonalds, So we asked Kyle if he could drive us. He said no.. AND THATS WHEN THE TROUBLE BEGAN. Britnee and I decided we would run across the street and grab one quickly so we wouldnt keep them waiting. Britnee had to pee and we were both laughing so hard because of this. The way we were running was pathetic and very amusing, and so our laughter was short-breathed. As we were running I turned back to check up on her making sure she hadnt peed yet, and when I turned to face forward again SHMUCK. I fell flat on my face and scratched my knee up pretty good, with a new hole in my jean, my knee was bleeding. :( It was so funny though, I didnt even feel the pain until later.

2. After Impact on Thursdays we leaders always go out to Mr. Mikes to get some appies. Now.. I dont drink Pop, in fact I havent since January of this year. When we were there Kyle was sitting right in front of me., I guess his hand pushed his pop, and it all spilled right on to my lap. I had everyone laughing at me saying things like.. "kylie peed" BUT DID I? NO I DIDNT.

3. I almost fell again the Friday we just had. I was in bluenotes and my purse was on the ground and my foot got stuck in the strap. So deadly. In front of a decent looking guy might I add. We also so Kathryn Schultz at H&M which was cool, because I havent seen her in over a year. :( Fun Fun.

4. My family and I are putting a deck in our backyard. Its in the beginning stages still.. but its looking pretty good. Im excited to actually have a decent looking backyard now. :)

story time is over now. go find your mommies and have some warm milk. I will be back here again next week. SAME TIME SAME PLACE.

;)

`I'd paint the walls with your favorite color just to make you happy.

This summer is going to be meant for me to soul-search. I need to find out who I am. What I want to do. Why I want to do it. What makes me down right happy. What makes me upset. What makes me become a mean person. What makes me become a nice person. I am going to do this. I am surrounded by loving and caring friends who will support me every step of the way. I will get down, I will feel lost, but im ready, because I know I can only go up from there. I can only get better.

where do I go from here?

Now that my life is 'over'

where do i go now?

what do i do now?

Lord show me your light

show me your love

because I am lost.

I am lost.

You remain.

You remain.

God's Love reigns.

This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers. 1 John 3:16

Hatred stirs up dissension, but love covers over all wrongs. Proverbs 10:12

God has my life. All of it. He loves me unconditionally. I love him unconditionally.

Thank You Lord.

dream big little one.

I want to jump out of an airplane. I want to go to Egypt. I want to help children in Africa. I want to be a psychologist. I want to swim in beautiful green water. I want to change people's lives. I want to stop children molestation. I want to preach God's word. I want to bring people to christ. I want to be an inspiration. I want to see the eiffel tower. I want to drink wine and eat cheese and baguette in Paris. I want to own a closet. (maybe a walk-in..haha) I want to be famous some how. I want to win the lottery. I want to be happy. I want to be married. I want 2 kids. I want a golden retriever && a husky. I want to make people happy. I want to share. I want to forget about how I used to be. I want to do the grouse grind. I want to do the polar bear swim. I want to walk in a desert. I want to be organized. I want to be bright. I want to be smart. I want to get good grades. I dont want to use excuses. I want to go to school, get my Ph.D. I want to be successful. I want to love. I want to be passionate. I want to be proud. This I will dream. I CAN.

those steps that need to be taken.

I knew this year would be big for me. Believe me i knew. But for it to be big, I had to be broken. I had to be so low, and so hurt and so done that I needed to give up. I needed that, so that I could see my world. What it had become. I know my parents arent impressed with me. I can see it on their faces. I feel so far from the relationship that I once had with them. And I hate that. I dont want to lie, and blame anyone but myself. I know I have changed. I dont want to disappoint anyone else anymore. I want to change. And I have God to thank. I was so low you guys. I was so broken. I felt like my life was a mess.. and I put a rug over it, sweeping all the bad things in my life under the rug, trying to hide what I was going through, to hide who I was becoming. I am so glad that i got the oppurtunity to see this and now I can work towards getting my life back, work on being happy. To dream again, to believe in life, and that anything is possible. lets do this. Im going to do this.

you sprayed poison on me.

Salesman: do you like your job?

Kylie: Yea..

Salesman: really? because you never smile..
Kylie: ....oh?

Salesman: its true.. even when people are being cheerful towards you, you never smile.

Kylie.......
Salesman: maybe your just bored?

Kylie.. hmm.. yea maybe

WHAT THE HELL IS THAT ABOUT? honestly I want to cry. He has no right in talking to me like that. He has no idea what I go through. Who does he think he is? Agh. He is so wierd, and creepy. AND STOP TALKING TO ME YOU FREAK. GOSH. omg. I am on a rampage right now. I am between wanting to ball my eyes out, and smacking him in the face. I mean how rude can you get. FYI i do fricken smile. ALOT. But only when I want to. I am not going to put on a fricken fake smile, I had done that for a few years already. I dont want to go back there, So screw off you hippy. I dont want your "health water".

Way to make my day a little worse.

GR.

Kylie.

annie heres your telescope.

This world is sick. I had a brief discussion with my mom, my sister and Donavin yesterday on this worlds state. I had mentioned that I am afraid for my future children to live in this world. What certain people have made it to be. We started talking about all the child pornography out there, and the purpose behind it.. there isnt one. The episodes of Oprah, regarding children from 26 days old to 10 years old being molested and raped... babies with soothers. I started to cry. I cried for the kids who have gone through it, and have had this dreadful and frightening experience. And I cried for the kids that it hasnt happened to yet but eventually will. To take that experience from a child is disgusting, and it hurts me that children in this world are suffering from these men who think its okay, who think its right, who want to get pleasure from a fricken child. I feel sick to my stomach when I think of them, and even sicker to think of a child being faced with the emotional stress of it, being exposed to sexual images, images that will scar them for life, and being forced to do things they didnt even know could be done. My heart hurts for them. I feel helpless and so distant from being able to help them.

hoping to make a change.
kylie

you are my world.

I am so glad that I have the friends that I have. They make my life amazing and worth while. Thank you SO much guys.
br.ch.ts.cd.kn.dm.dr.sr.ai.cd.jf.ad.sd.lb.bk.jm.th.cd.

And I'd melt the world with my eyes.

Just look at me. Really look at me. I'm growing up, look at me. Today I wrote my last exam for this semester. I have a paper still due, but the fact of the matter is, I wrote my last exam. I thought of being in middle school today. I thought of being told what to do, when to eat lunch, when to go to class, when to go outside, when to go inside, when to run, when to sit still, when to be quiet, etc. That's great. It really is, but if you really analyze it, you notice that its very structured. High school is not that much better, they still structure your life. Don't get me wrong, structure is very good. School does not prepare you for the real world. there. I said it. SCHOOL DOES NOT PREPARE YOU FOR THE REAL WORLD.
Because I'll tell you right now, being in college, people don't tell you what to do, when to eat lunch, when to go to class, when to go outside, when to go inside, when to run, when to sit still, when to be quiet etc. They don't. Its scary when you first get out there.. where there is no structure. Because its up to you. This is what being an adult is like. Of course there is commitments, bills, obligations. But the definer of being an adult, is making your life structured. Its not a teacher, or a principal or a boss telling you. Its you. and the question is.. Do you have what it takes? Can you say that you are ready to make your life structured.. because I know I wasn't. Me in charge of my life? It sounds scary. I have to arrange time to do schoolwork, to work, to get to work, to get home, to spend time at Youth, Church, with friends, and time for me. I will admit, I have been a crappy friend, and a girlfriend. I can only blame myself. I am not used to structuring my life yet, and it will take some more time. But I have finally realized why this is so difficult for me. And I hope this will prepare you for what is to come once you throw that cap in the air, and you are no longer a student at a high school.
I believe it is now time I change my title to my blog, since I am no longer a high school graduate, I am a college go-er!

Cheers.
Kyyyylie. ♥

Shakespeare will make it better.

I love my new water bottle. Its blue and small and cute, and everything anyone could ever ask for in a water bottle. I have a theory. A theory that will change my outlook on life. My theory is im bored. I am not happy. I am bored. I have been working at the same job for over a year now. Im bored. I have been in school now for a year now.. and im bored. Furthermore my theory is that I will soon be happy once I am done school, and get a new job. Now Now.. you might be thinking well.. you cant solve your unhappiness with a new job, and some time of school.. but you might be surprised. This gives me an ounce of hope, and im tremendously interested where I end up.

Im sorry im bitter. forgive me.

tressla.
kylie.

When Dawson Loved Joey.

In that hot bed, I can see a million things that make me happy.
waking up at 6 am, to watch Dawsons Creek.
Being 5&6 and wearing the same shirt my dad picked out for me.
Being a vegetarian.
going on the california screaming 9 times. in a row.
seeing him in the pool, and having him follow me.
talking to him about his hair. that he cut with scissors himself.
playing go-fish with uncle wally.
going on the revelation with her.
going to the library and mcdonalds for breakfast.
playing house with them.


but why am i surprised.. that I dont have much that made me happy? my childhood was not happy. and you cant change the past.

Good Morning Easter.

What is more important? making yourself happy, or making other people happy?

Most of you would say making yourself happy.. and yet we are always told not to disappoint people. I'm stuck in a pickle, a pickle I made for myself. I cannot blame anyone else. But the damage this pickle is doing is very tremendous, and could scar people for life, myself included. I have not told anyone. So for all those people out there who think you know what I'm talking about, you don't. And I will continue not to tell anyone. Because no one is on my side for this battle. No one will agree with me. I am alone.


So wait for me on that cold dark night, and hear those owls. And put those stars in your pocket, because you're going to need them. You're going to need them. Because I don't know if I'm going to show. I don't know if I will come. I don't know if I will satisfy. So have those stars. Because you're going to need them.

for lack of better topics.

Im so selfish. Im not thinking of you, im thinking of me. my body is undeniably suffering. the beach was fun, it could have been a blast.. but it wasnt. yea lets plan things.. things that will probably never happen. Im doing bad things, to the people I love. I hang out with my sister, sometimes she is the only one i can trust. he thinks I am hot, and thinks i should be single. I feel so alone. I miss her so much, I actually cry. this whole time, what have i done? what is the opposite of improve? because.. whatever it is.. thats what i am. I honestly suck at life, so please for the time being.. dont rely on me to help you out, or to be a good friend. because im sucking at everything right now.

its that raw emotion that gets to ya.

Im so broken. You have alot to say. I have alot to learn. I need to feel this way. Its been awhile. lets be friends again. lets love each other. why are you tempting me. why are you tempting me. why are you tempting me. i sinned. im sorry. this world aint big enough for the two of us. can you please back off. can you please give me my space. its not fun when you smother me. the excitement of old things scare me. I want to be new. I want to be fresh. i didnt need to be talked about behind my back thank you. I didnt need that today. im starting an obsession. I hate how people follow. I need to sleep and I need to be awake. this is important. just breathe. just breathe. where is the fun. im in between adult and adult. without the fun. can you catch this star, i wished upon it. ;] how come i like him more than usual? how come im talking to him more. how come he fascinates me? gr. im so lost. and this isnt really helping. it doesnt even come close to all the emotion that im feeling right now. no no no
gr. someone get me some nyquil!!!

How do I love thee? Let me count thy ways.

Its when you let me hold your pinky with mine. I know you hate it, but you let me do it anyways. Its when you trace away hair from my face. Its how you kiss me. Its when you hug me. Its how you whisper in my ear "I Love You". Its when you tell me things about your day. It how you get so excited to see me. Its how you took me to science world. Its how you come to youth church with me. Its when you smile at me. Its when I see you smile, how it makes me smile. Its how I can talk to you about anything. Its how we fight, but we can never stay mad at each other for long. Its how we plan things together. Its how when you think, you look absolutely adorable. Its how you smell so good.
I Love you so much.

Whoa! Hey, hey-Oh what a ride

What a perfect sky to frame

Your hazel eyes

I'd scream on the inside

But right now it feels like

I'veBeen tranquilized

Oh, what a fool am I

To be tongue-tied

Sitting next to him

The princess and the passenger

You touch the rain and suddenly

There's waterfalls

Now every day is something more

Worth fighting for

Baby, you make the sun shine down

You make the sun shine down

You can paint the darkest clouds

And turn them into rainbows

You take your secret smile

The one that turns me on

Hey boy, you've been what I've waited for

Feet back on the pavement to the Basement

On the bright side of the road

Fumbling my lines to a lazy cat

On the step outside her door

She opens up

And I'm in the Polaroid

Standing next to him

The princess and the passenger

Touching the rain and suddenly

There's waterfalls

Now every day is something more

Worth living for

Baby, you make the sun shine down
You make the sun shine down
You can paint the darkest clouds
And turn them into rainbows
You take your secret smile
The one that turns me on
Hey boy, you've been what I've waited for

On a day like this when the worldIs elevated

On a day like this when I know just

Why I waited

On a day like this when the world Is elevated

On a day like this when I know just

Why I waited